What If Jesus Had Said, “I Really Don’t Need This”?

Posted on April 6, 2012 by Joy

Jesus cried out in a loud voice, “Eli, Eli, lema sabachthani?” (which means “My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?”). (Mathew 27:46)

I Really Don’t Need This – The Price of Calvary!

Late last night, My disciples ran away when I was arrested. Now since early morning I’ve been dragged back and forth between the Pharisees, Pilate and King Herod. It’s been a terrible few hours.

I don’t need this! The degradation of Roman soldiers making fun of Me as they throw a king’s robe around Me. I don’t need them shaping a crown of thorns – piercing sharp thorns – that puncture My scalp and make My head feel like it is going to rupture from pulsating pain. I don’t need to endure the guttural sounds as those soldiers clear phlegm from their throats and spew it with disgust into My face and eyes. I am a king. I could strike them down with one word.

No, I don’t need this! All of you in the crowd who are laughing and swearing, screaming with sadistic pleasure as you watch Me being tortured by the soldiers. I hear your humiliating words and see your vulgar gestures, even as I am dragged about the courtyard with blood pouring down My face and the rest of My body onto the kingly robe. I am the king of heaven and angels once bowed before Me with adoration and songs of praise, honored to be in My presence.

And I don’t need this! The heavy cross that I can no longer drag on My shoulders because of sheer physical exhaustion and the horrific pain from the courtyard torture I just suffered. I don’t need to lie here in the dirt, crushed beneath the weight of the cross only to turn My head upward and to see you laughing at Me, calling Me a weakling and kicking Me in the side to get Me standing again. I am all-powerful. I could get up and with one word suspend a thousand crosses in the air.

I really don’t need this! Submitting humbly to Roman soldiers as they throw Me to the ground, then roll Me onto the cross, putting huge spikes into My hands and feet and pounding them in as every muscle fiber and sinew screams with excruciating pain. Then feeling the pain exploding from deep within as they shove the cross forcefully into the ground. And hanging there almost naked as you look on and ridicule Me. Then seeing the heart-wrenching sight of My mother held up by John, as she cries uncontrollably. But I am all-merciful. I give My mother to John to care for her. And I ask My Father’s forgiveness for you who mock Me.

And most of all, I don’t need this! To be enveloped in the blackest blackness and to feel I have lost the relationship that I’ve had with My Father since eternity. To cry out and ask Him why He has forsaken Me and to feel like He has withdrawn His love from Me. To think He sees Me only as sin, complete and total sin, in all its ugliness. To believe He has turned His back on Me and will never accept Me again because sin is the antithesis of God and cannot stand in His presence. I was the Son of God but now I am sin. I am lost. I am without hope. I am nothing. I really don’t need this!

Oh Yes, I Really Need This – The Rewards of Calvary!

I don’t need this… but you do! You needed Me to come as a baby, to be teased as a child, to be rejected as a man, to face a death that no-one could even imagine. You needed this… what I endured… you who face the despair of this world without the hope I offer, you who have nothingness beyond the grave without the eternal life I promise.

And because I love every one of you who need this, then I really need this too.

Oh yes, I need this because My heart is bursting with love for the creations I made. I need this because you are My brothers and sisters and there is nothing I wouldn’t do for you. I need this because I want to show to the universe that My Father God is a God of justice and righteousness, a God to be honored above everything because He is the epitome of love in its purest form. I need this because eternity wouldn’t be the same for My Father, the Holy Spirit, or Me if I didn’t walk to Calvary to make it possible for you to be part of that eternity.

I need this because it taught Me, as I hung on the cross, what it felt like to be eternally separated from My Father – when I cried, “My God, My God, why have you forsaken Me?” Those few moments in time made Me realize even more than I could have ever imagined that My Father, I and the Holy Spirit are One. The sense of separation I endured was like a ripping apart of the very fiber of Our beings as it felt like My Father and the Spirit were moving swiftly away into an eternity where I wouldn’t be a part of Them any longer. And I didn’t want you to feel that sense of separation from your Maker too, which comes as a result of sin.

I need this because now that I am back with My Father and the Holy Spirit in the celestial center of the universe, I can speak on your behalf to My Father. I can speak of the men, women and children on Earth who struggle, who fight battles because of the enemy that never stops the barrage against them. I can talk to My Father about you and all the pain you endure, the struggles you deal with, the times you fail and the times you succeed.

And You Need This Too – The Blood of Calvary!

And always, I can tell My Father, she is My sister, he is My brother. For them, I wore the spit as it landed on Me and slid down My face. For them, I wore the piercing thorns in the crown on My head and the raw open wounds from the beatings and whippings I endured. For them, I wore the robe of mockery and bore the weight of the cross on My shoulders until I could carry it no more. For them, I felt the physical torture when the nails went into My hands and feet and as I hung there with My body physically ripping apart. For them, I felt the humiliation as people screamed at, swore at, and taunted Me hanging there physically exposed. For them, I felt the isolation as My followers deserted Me and the despair of total aloneness as You, Father, remained hidden in the blackness of the cloud.

And because of all that, My sisters and brothers who believe in Me have told Me they are willing – ashamed but willing – to let Me speak before My Father on their behalf. They said they will let My blood be their blood. They said they will let My sacrifice as the Lamb of God be their sacrifice. They said they want Me to stand as both their lawyer and their judge to plead their case for forgiveness and to grant forgiveness to them. They said they want My pure white robe to be their robe to show their purity through Me to the Father.

So yes, I really need this and you need this too. My blood, My sacrifice, My life, My death, My resurrection, gives hope to the hopeless, forgiveness to those who don’t believe they deserve it, and eternal life to all those who say, “Thank you for taking My place, Lord, I claim your blood. Thank you for taking that walk to Calvary.”

And that simple thank you from YOU is worth every tortured step I took. Yes, I really need that too!

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That’s My King

Posted on April 8, 2012 by Joy

Happy Easter

He is not here; he has risen, just as he said. Come and see the place where he lay. Mathew 28:6, NIV

If this video doesn’t fill your heart till it feels like bursting, I don’t know what will.  :-)

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The (Scientific) Death of Jesus

Posted on April 6, 2012 by Joy

The following is taken from the God Vine.

For the next 60 seconds, set aside whatever you’re doing and read this. So powerful.

At the age of 33, Jesus was condemned to the death penalty.

At the time crucifixion was the “worst” death. Only the worst criminals condemned to be crucified. Yet it was even more dreadful for Jesus, unlike other criminals condemned to death by crucifixion, Jesus was to be nailed to the cross by His hands and feet.

Each nail was 6 to 8 inches long.

The nails were driven into His wrist.
Not into His palms as is commonly portrayed.
There’s a tendon in the wrist that extends to the shoulder.
The Roman guards knew that when the nails were being hammered into the wrist, that tendon would tear and break, forcing Jesus to use His back muscles to support himself so that He could breathe.

Both of His feet were nailed together.
Thus He was forced to support Himself on the single nail that impaled His feet to the cross.
Jesus could not support himself with His legs because of the pain, so He was forced to alternate between arching His back then using his legs just to continue to breathe.
Imagine the struggle, the pain, the suffering, the courage.

Jesus endured this reality for over 3 hours.

Yes, over 3 hours!
Can you imagine this kind of suffering?
A few minutes before He died,
Jesus stopped bleeding.
He was simply pouring water from his wounds.

From common images, we see wounds to His hands and feet and even the spear wound to His side…
But do we realize His wounds were actually made in his body.
A hammer driving large nails through the wrist, the feet overlapped and an even large nail hammered through the arches,
then a Roman guard piercing His side with a spear.
But before the nails and the spear, Jesus was whipped and beaten.
The whipping was so severe that it tore the flesh from His body.
The beating so horrific that His face was torn and his beard ripped from His face.
The crown of thorns cut deeply into His scalp.
Most men would not have survived this torture.

He had no more blood to bleed out,
only water poured from His wounds.
The human adult body contains about 3.5 liters (just less than a gallon) of blood.

Jesus poured all 3.5 liters of his blood;
He had three nails hammered into His members;
a crown of thorns on His head and, beyond that,
a Roman soldier who stabbed a spear into His side.

All these without mentioning the humiliation
He passed after carrying His own cross for almost 2 kilometers,
while the crowd spat in his face and threw stones
(the cross was almost 30 kg of weight, only for its higher part,
where His hands were nailed).

Jesus had to endure this experience, so that we can have free access to God.

So that our sins could be “washed” away. All of them, with no exception!

JESUS CHRIST DIED FOR US!

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Peace, Be Still

Posted on October 10, 2011 by Joy

For he commandeth, and raiseth the stormy wind, which lifteth up the waves thereof. (The Bible, Psalms 107:25, NIV)

Disciples on the Sea

I see the disciples on the Sea of Galilee. Jesus stayed behind to dismiss the crowd after teaching all day on the mountainside. He decided to take a break to rejuvenate and commune with His Father. He sent the disciples in the boat to the other side of the sea and told them He would meet them there.

They used their oars – strong men, some fishermen who were used to fishing at night. They’d had lots of practice in battling wind and waves. But this night was different than all the others. This was one storm they couldn’t fight against. They tried, but the rain and the wind and waves were too strong. What made this storm so different? Jesus was in control of the wind and waves. Did He breathe the storm into existence, a storm designed to teach a lesson to His followers?

How to Make Jesus King

They wanted Jesus to be king. They were strategizing how to make that happen. They probably expected to see Him on the other side the next morning. They were eager to greet Him with their brilliant scheme – rise up, assert Yourself, declare Yourself King of the Jews, the people are on Your side after all the miracles You’ve done. You fed thousands with only a few loaves and fish. You can take down the army of Rome with only a few words. You can command anything and anyone. We’d be honoured to be part of your inner court. There’s just the small problem of who gets to be number one advisor to You.

Supernatural Storm?

But in the darkness of the night with the howling wind screaming in their ears, they caught glimpses of fear in each other’s faces, as lightning flashed across the sky. How could the night end so badly after such a great day with Jesus? Doubts crept in. Even those known for their strength and prowess in navigating any kind of waters were trembling inside even if their faces didn’t portray the terror they felt. They had not fought a battle against the sea like this one – it seemed almost supernatural. Where did the storm come from? One minute the water was calm, the next the waves were crashing over the bow.

Where was Jesus when they needed Him? Why did He leave them to cross the sea alone? They had spent so much time with Him, stayed close to Him daily, put their own lives on hold to walk with Him just because He said, “Follow Me.” Why? What did He say or do or how did He look at them that made them throw away their livelihoods to follow someone who had abandoned them now?

Here they thought they were in a good place, going somewhere, soon to be courtiers with fancy robes, worth it to leave other things behind to have that kind of reward – rich foods, fancy clothes, beautiful women (yes, I know, said some, I guess I’ll have to bring my wife along, wish I was single like John).

Now, all they had invested was likely to be lost – they were going to die. The waves were going to take them down to a watery grave. They deserved better than this. They didn’t choose to die. Where was Jesus? Why wasn’t He there? “Oh Jesus, we need You,” they cried. “Help us, we perish,” they cried.

A Strange Light on the Water

What? Was that a light across the darkness? Or was it just another lightning flash? No, it was a light travelling across the top of the water. Some reflected light from somewhere? Hard to see as the waves kept crashing over, as they kept bailing out the boat, some trying to keep the boat upright with the oars, others bailing faster and faster, terror in all their eyes. But John said, “Look. What is it? Something strange on the water. Can you make it out?”

James, at one of the large heavy wooden oars, glanced up quickly and said, “I see it too. It’s getting closer. A spirit? Is it an evil spirit coming to take us down – is it the spirit of death? Is this the end? Oh Jesus, where are You?”

Peter, another oarsman, looked up, a wave splashing over him, drenching him completely. As he came back up sputtering, there was more than water coming out of his mouth – vile words, filthy words, cursing words raging at the sea as it raged at him. Peter, the giant, the man with a raging temper, how fitting to have him facing the raging sea. The form drew closer. Even Peter trembled inside – his words belied his fears. Someone suddenly shouted, “It’s Jesus.” What? It couldn’t be. But it was. How could He be walking on water?

Look at Me, Walking on the Water!

Peter called out, “If it’s you, Master, let me come out and walk to you.” “Come on out,” Jesus called back, a glint in his eyes and a smile on His face. Peter, bold façade, stepped out, and then started walking with his eyes fixed firmly on Jesus. What was happening? “Hey, I am really walking on water. This feels kind of like walking on a firm piece of wood. Let me just check back with the brothers.”

He turned and looked back, taking his eyes off Jesus. Something changed. It seemed that the firm board was slipping away and he began going down. It would have been laughable if it wasn’t so scary. Going down, toes slipping under, then ankles and knees and now up to his waist. “I’m drowning,” he screamed. “Jesus, save me, I’m not going to make it, I can’t swim in this kind of storm,” gasping and choking, he screamed.

Then suddenly, Jesus’ strong arms pulled him up, looking into his eyes of terror. He was back on top walking with Jesus, his eyes only on Him. Who was this man? Who was this man that even the winds and the waves obeyed Him?

Peace, Be Still

Jesus smiled again, a smile that went deep into Peter’s heart. He felt warm though he was physically shivering from the cold. “Peace, be still,” Jesus said. And the peace was not meant only for the wind and the waves and the storm, it was for the heart of Peter. Jesus’ eyes gave peace and stilled Peter’s raging heart, stilled Peter’s terrified heart, stilled the soul of a man who had seldom known peace in his life.

If Jesus could bring that kind of peace to Peter, can He give the same kind of peace to you and me? Right now a lot of things are raging around me. I feel like I am in the storm and drowning like Peter and the other disciples. It’s one of those few times in my life when I have felt almost completely helpless, not knowing how to deal with the situation I’m  dealing with.

It’s a good lesson for me because I am often so independent I don’t look to God as quickly as I should – I try to solve my challenges on my own. But right now I have decided, like Peter, to call out, “Lord, save me, I’m drowning.”

Already His words are coming back to me, kindly, gently, lovingly, “Peace, be still. My child, I’m not talking only about the storm. I’m talking about you. You don’t have to carry this one alone. In fact, you don’t have to carry it at all. Give this one to Me and let me do the heavy lifting for you. I’ve promised you that I am with you always and I will give you peace.”

And the challenge for me is let it all go and let Him take over, knowing that if He could lift Peter out of the storm, He can lift me too and give that peace that can only come from Him. And I’m looking forward to those words continuing to remind me as I deal with my current challenge, “Peace, be still.”

Church Art

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Broken Arm – An Answered Prayer

Posted on October 5, 2011 by Joy

Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding. (The Bible, Proverbs 3:5, NIV)

What is God’s spirit telling me today?

Working in the Garden

My child, does the story of the bull take you to another time only a year later? Again, at the sawmill where you spent your summers. You were out in the garden weeding the garden and picking strawberries that day.  You must have been working for at least an hour in that hot sun, only nine years old, and you got tired and wanted to take a break. There’s nothing wrong with that.

You can see how adults condition themselves to take coffee breaks every couple of hours, even in office jobs, so it shouldn’t be a bad thing for a nine-year-old to take a play break after physical labour in the hot sun.

Children Need to be Children

You loved to explore, to run, and to climb. And today you just had to climb a tree. Nothing wrong with that. And you climbed, up from one branch to another, with the agility of a young child, no fear and no adult watching and calling out to be careful.

Oh, sometimes, I want to take those adults and lock them away to give their children a break, to let them explore their world, My world that I have given to them. Children need to experience both their world and their physical abilities – running, climbing, swinging, all the body movements that they are capable of using.

Broken Arm

So, higher and higher you went. I knew about that rotten branch several feet up. I knew what would happen when you stepped on it. And I could have stopped you from going higher. I could have caused someone to come outside and yell at you to get down. But I didn’t. I let you climb, experiencing the freedom of childhood. You missed so much because of fear as a younger child. You needed to learn and grow.

Then you stepped on that rotten branch and it broke, rot unable to withstand the pressure of even a young child’s weight on it. And you fell. In that instant, you cried out to Me to save you and I was proud – my child learning to let go and trust in Me.

You landed hard on that pile of lumber beneath the tree. Aren’t you glad that wasps didn’t build a nest in that pile like they did in so many others that you discovered that summer? And you lay there for a few short seconds recovering your breath – even at that young age, you knew your fall could hurt you badly.

Then looking at your right arm, searing with pain from wrist to shoulder, you saw an ugly sight. Your wrist hanging down in such a strange position that you knew there was something wrong. Up you got and ran to the house, calling out, “Oh me, oh my, I’ve broken my arm.” Indeed you had, dislocating your wrist and breaking your arm in two places.

Aren’t you glad now you were able to get up and run to the house? Aren’t you glad you didn’t just lie there on top of the boards, unconscious with a head injury? Aren’t you glad your body wasn’t twisted and mangled with damage to the spine that meant you would never walk again?

Answered Prayer

It could have been. And your aunt knew that at the time, but said nothing, not to you anyway. But she did talk to Me about it when things settled down and you returned from the hospital with your cast from wrist to shoulder and only a few scratches on your body. She didn’t show much emotion, but that night she wept inwardly as she told Me how thankful she was that I had spared you from greater injury.

And even in spite of her serious ways, she had a hint of humour in her words as she thanked Me for answering your prayer – yes, you had prayed for a broken arm! And you got it. I know, it would have been more fun to get it during the school year when all the students in school could sign your cast and put you on a pedestal for a day or two, since a broken arm was such a way to get attention from the other kids.

And you, you didn’t even thank Me for the broken arm. You berated yourself and told yourself that you must have deserved it – you were supposed to be weeding and picking strawberries and went off to play instead. You looked at your injury as a sign that you were being punished for your sins.

The Trust Lesson

Oh, My child, that’s not what it was about. It was a trust lesson, not punishment. I allowed the natural consequence of an action to unfold – not to punish, just because that is part of life. And now there is a larger lesson for you to learn. A rotten tree limb is disease and disease is sin. There are natural consequences to putting yourself in a place where sin abides.

My children fall, sometimes hard like you did, and sometimes not as hard. But regardless of how you land, I am always there. I do break the fall at times and My children walk away unscathed. Other times, I just let the natural consequence play itself out. I always want to rescue, rescue, rescue. But I know that is the wrong thing to do.

I want you to live life fully, to experience the joy. I know at times there will also be pain, but that provides understanding about life that you would learn no other way. I hope during those challenging times you are as willing to trust Me as you do when your days are full of joy.

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Live like a Pharisee or Live with Joy

Posted on September 23, 2011 by Joy

For he shall give his angels charge over thee, to keep thee in all thy ways. (The Bible, NIV: Psalm 91:11)

I and My Father Are One

“My image is love.” The image of my heavenly Father portrayed most clearly by the visual image of a Son who came to earth as an ambassador for the Father. I and my Father are one, says Jesus. What does it really mean to be one? One in the Father, Son and Holy Spirit.

I cannot imagine what it was like from time eternal for the Father, Son and Holy Spirit to be one. Show me a better picture of that, Lord, for my own understanding.

I the Father have always been. You cannot even begin to comprehend what that means because you are not God. If I take you back even a few thousand years, you will hardly be able to grasp it, so that is as far as we will go, not back eons of time when we were creating, and creating and creating. One day you will see just the tiniest glimpse of what we created when you are invited home – home to spend forever with Me, when you will experience time travel (or actually no time travel, since time will be meaningless to you as it is already for Me). The only thing that has meaning in terms of time will be the weekly celebration of My Holy Day when all my people will come before Me and My Son Jesus to celebrate the forever rest you will have.

I know you get tired at times. I can see the struggles you’ve been having over the past few months as you have been on your gradual back-to-work program. I see you come home at night and have no energy for anything. All you want to do is lie down and sleep, and you know what happens when you do that – you continue to perpetuate the cycle of a late afternoon nap followed by not being able to sleep at night, followed by a very tiring day at work the next day.

Remember The Bull?

But you won’t need to go through that when you are safe in my kingdom. You will have the energy of your childhood, when you loved to run and play, exploring the mountain trails and paths, running down sawdust piles and playing bakery in the creek bed. You have probably forgotten a lot of the memories of those days, haven’t you? But I have not forgotten.

I watched you and your sister and brothers with such joy as you played in a world where you felt safe. You knew Me with your childlike understanding and trusted Me as a young child does. Remember the day, the Sabbath day, when your aunt and uncle and older cousins were having a nap and you were outside playing.

Remember the little red cowboy jacket with fringes on the arms. Remember the cows and the bull coming down the dirt road. Remember the bull stopping not far away from where your brother had you tied up to the tree. And the bull prepared to charge. What went through your head at the time?

Who Really Saved You from the Bull?

I know, I am Your father – you cried out in silence to Me to save you. Your brothers and sisters were screaming for help and your aunt came out the door of the cabin. She paused for a moment. You didn’t know it then, but I can tell you now because you have grown. She was terrified. She thought the bull was going to gore you to death.

She sent up a quick prayer for help, and then her eyes lighted on a large bone lying only a few steps away. She picked it up and with the aim of a star baseball player, she hurled it at the bull, and hit him on the shoulder. The bull turned away and continued down his path.

So do you think your aunt was that skilled at baseball? How many times did you see her throw a ball or anything else with such accurate aim? She was always proud that she had made the bull turn away, as she related the story over the years.

But she didn’t speak aloud of what she knew in her heart – that I answered her silent prayer. I gave her the strength to hurl that bone – would you believe, I even made a few adjustments in the trajectory so it landed in just the right spot.

But something she didn’t know and none of the rest of you knew all this time – at the same time as she made her mark, your angel was there too and synchronously at the moment that bone hit, moved that bull’s head and body in a new direction.

Really, all of you thought a bone could make enough impact to move several tonnes of solid mass in a specific direction? Think again. I know – you didn’t like physics in school and didn’t do well in it (yes, I saw the exam paper you got back that day with the big 0 percent mark splashed across the first page. Ouch, how did you manage that one with all the intelligence I gave you?) But I think you can figure out that one bone does not have enough mass to turn a very heavy object. So there had to be something else.

Oh, sometimes I wanted so badly to let my angels reveal themselves to you, to let you see that you were safe in my hands. But it would have spoiled all the mystery and fun. After all, how many women can tell a tale of how they turned a huge bull away from killing a child because of their own strength and accurate aim? So Aunt K carried the story in her heart of her prayer, knowing I had answered. For some reason, she didn’t share the revelation I gave her during those few minutes. She needed to think about it before she actually realized that I had answered her prayer.

And I had answered your prayer too, sitting there staring down the face of a massive bull, helpless as your hands were bound by your brother’s rope. I know what went through your heart during that time and after. You were feeling guilty – you thought you deserved to die. You were out playing and it was my Holy Sabbath Day and you were playing “Cowboys and Indians”. You were taught that games like that were not appropriate. You thought you should either be sleeping like the adults or sitting in the house reading the Bible. How old were you then – only eight? A child – my child outdoors enjoying the beautiful things I had created for your pleasure! A few minutes of a childish game, using your imaginations as you played, and now you were condemning yourself, thinking the bull had been sent to punish you.

Live with Joy

Oh, how much you have to learn of Me and of My love for you. You missed so much because you were bound by the rules of the Pharisees. Yes, I know you didn’t live with Pharisees, they lived two thousand years earlier, but you and your family somehow managed to create Pharisees in your lives anyway. And missed so much joy because of it. How sad for you. How sad for Me.

So now do you want to live like a Pharisee or to live with joy? I hope it’s the latter this time.

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Was God Really There on 9-11?

Posted on September 11, 2011 by Joy

Weeping may stay for the night, but rejoicing comes in the morning. (The Bible: Psalm 30:25, NIV)

The Tragedy of 911

How do we make sense of all the pain and heartache of 9-11 that continues in the hearts of so many today? Is it any different than all the tragedies in our world for the past 2000 years?

On a personal note, is it any different than the night that I, a 5-year-old, woke up to my mother’s life poured out on a bed sheet soaked in blood? Or the night my 8-month-old nephew died of crib death? Or the day my 2-year-old nephew drowned in a backyard wading pool? Or the day I came home from church and found my brother dead in my garage? And more recently, the day my dad passed away from kidney failure?

The only difference is one of scale and visibility. On 9-11, thousands of people died unimaginable deaths with the world transfixed on television screens as it happened before their eyes. In my personal encounters with death, there were no TV cameras and the world was not looking on as the lives of individual adults and children ended.

All I know from my own experience is that the more loss we feel the more grateful we should be for whatever it was we had to lose. It means that we had something worth grieving for. The ones I’m sorry for are the ones that go through life not knowing what grief is. (Frank O’Connor)

What Do We Do With the Pain?

What do we do with the pain? Hold it up against God, screaming at Him for deserting us? Or hold it before Him and ask Him to take the pain away and to heal our hearts?

We can choose our reaction to life circumstances. At some point we need to choose whether or not we will let go of the anger and all the other emotions that come from that pain and to move on through the stages of grief to acceptance of what has happened. Our choice determines our path to a future full of joy or one filled with ongoing bitterness or sadness.

People in mourning have to come to grips with death before they can live again.
Mourning can go on for years and years.
It doesn’t end after a year, that’s a false fantasy.
It usually ends when people realize that they can live again,
that they can concentrate their energies on their lives as a whole,
and not on their hurt, and guilt and pain. (Elizabeth Kubler Ross)

I would never discount what happened on 9-11. In one day a country was changed and individual families were changed forever. But God was there with all those who were hurting and continues to be there for all those who invite Him to be a part of their lives today.

My prayer today is that healing continues for the broken-hearted and that God’s offer of hope comes to those still living with despair from that event of 10 years ago.

Great joys make us love the world. Great sadnesses make us understand the world. (Kent Nerburn)

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This Is the Truth Upside Down

Posted on September 10, 2011 by Joy

Always worth looking at things from a different angle. Amazing what we can see!

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60 Minutes with God: Incomprehensible Love

Posted on August 17, 2011 by Joy
The Heart of God

Always Available

I’m back, God. I have time now. I’m not rushed. I don’t have to leave for work or for an appointment. I expect I’ll be awake for another hour this evening, so if you are available and want to talk, I would love to connect with you again to finish off this morning’s talk.

If I am available and want to talk? Oh, My child, I am always available. I love you. I always want to talk with you. You are My daughter, My creation, the desire of My heart. You are such a being of delight to My soul. I want you in My life all the time, not just for a few minutes every day or when you think you can find some time or when you are desperate because of some challenges you are facing.

I Will Never Leave You

I have told you before that I will never leave you or forsake you. (The Bible, Joshua 1:5, NIV) Do you know what it means when I say I will never leave you? You are never out of My mind, you are never out of My sight. No matter where you go, how you act, what you do, you are My child. I care so deeply for you that you cannot even imagine what that means. Inside of My being is a sense of overwhelm at times as I live with the love I have for you that you are not ready to accept. I yearn for you to connect with Me. I wait patiently every day, throughout the day, every moment that you lose sight of Me, for you to turn back toward Me.

And when you do turn back – for a minute, an hour, a day – I am as excited to have you back in My presence as you are excited to connect with your own daughter who lives so far away. Wrong! I am more excited than you could ever be. You think you discovered the meaning of love when you had a child. It grew deeper as your daughter grew and through the years, in spite of some heartbreaks and deep pain, you didn’t stop loving your child.

My love for you began before you can even imagine. It began before you were conceived, before you were born, before you told Me you wanted to be one of My followers. My love for you was planted within the deepest part of My being from time immemorial. I know, you want to ask Me what that means, how I could plant inside Myself the seed of love for you from eternity and know that My love will continue through eternity, never-ending. You can’t understand it. I know, even as I share these thoughts with you, your mind is not able to grasp what I am saying. I don’t negate your ability or intelligence. How could I? I gave them to you. But as I have told you before, I am God, you’re not, so there are many things you are unable to comprehend.

I Want You to Know Me

I will never withhold Myself from you. The more you come to Me, in sincerity, trying to connect with Me, to accept Me as Your Father, the more I will open Myself to you. I am willing to open My heart to give you a glimpse of everything I am, but I am so complex that it will take eons of time for you to really get to know Me. So I am looking forward to the eternity we are going to spend together, when we can indeed “walk and talk as good friends should and do”, just like the words of the song.

Just as you breathe deeply to try and fill up your whole being with a sense of who I am, I ache for that to happen. I want you to know Me. As you know Me more, as you come to terms with the life I have let unfold for you, as you forgive yourself and others for all the hurts and pain that have happened in your life, you will become more whole. Gradually, as you turn your face to the Son, My Son, you will reflect the light of being in the presence of your Creator, the light of love, the love of your Maker, your Father, your Healer. You will become whole as I designed you to be.

My Purpose Is Love

You will become one with Me in purpose. God is love. Yes, I am indeed love. My whole purpose is to be love. And that will become your purpose in a way that you have never experienced before. You think that you understand love. My child, I tell you kindly, I tell you gently, I do not tell you to offend, but you don’t understand love. You have such a limited picture of what it means. I don’t blame you for that. You haven’t experienced a lot of love, in human form, in your life. It’s hard to connect to something that isn’t tangible. But even if you had experienced wonderful relationships those are just a tiny hint of what could be and what will be if you allow Me to live through you. I am so eager to breathe My love through you, like the illustration I gave you this morning of arteries flowing with blood, carrying nutrients and oxygen and enabling life to continue. Let Me take the life blood, the blood of love, the blood of Jesus and allow it to flow freely through you. It will carry the oxygen of life, what you need to live – love, only love.

Deep Love

You know the song, “All You Need Is Love.” (The Beatles) People don’t realize how close to the truth that is. But they are still singing about superficial love, the love between humans that is tinged with self-centeredness, not the love I have that has no restrictions, no barriers that set up walls or fences. I sense even as you listen to My heart and type these words, you can’t grasp the depth of My love. You can’t even scratch the surface.

If My love were compared to the deepest ocean depths, as it often is, you would still be floating on the top of the water with your head sticking out, occasionally dipping it under with your snorkelling mask on and gazing down to see what you could see.

Even in the clearest water you wouldn’t see much deeper than 20-30 feet. And that’s how you can compare your vision of My love to its reality. Just below the surface, your understanding gets murky. You see glimpses, like you see glimpses of beautiful fish darting about. But that’s as far as you can see right now.

“Now we see through a glass, darkly, but then face to face.” (The Bible, 1 Corinthians 13:12, KJV) But keep spending time with Me and you will see more and more. The reflected light of My Son’s face will shine down into the darkness of the water and break through with rays of beauty. That light will gradually penetrate deeper and deeper and as it does you will see more and more of My love, just as you would see more beauty in the water if you submersed yourself with the proper diving equipment.

God, how can I feel more of that deep love You have for Me?

Do you see the bubbles making their way closer and closer to the top of the water? Even before you are ready to immerse yourself fully in My love, diving deep, I release bubbles of love, hints of what wants to explode in your face:

I want to speak it aloud to help you understand, but My voice is louder than thunder and your eardrums would burst if I spoke passionately about My love for you. So I whisper in your ear. I speak gently about that deep love – in little things I open Myself to you, kind words, beauty in nature, something unexpected that brightens your day. Every day, every moment of every day there is something staring in your face and whispering in your ear and a feeling you get that is a taste of My love for you. So, be grateful for everything that comes into your life.

Who Are You, God?

God, it seems like so many people today don’t recognize You for who You are – they talk about the universe giving them everything, filling them with light and love. I don’t interpret things in the same way. But sometimes I wonder if I am too limited in my thinking. You are omnipresent, everywhere, all knowing, all powerful. Do people use language that I don’t relate to but still connect to You as the source of all that is good? Is it just that we are speaking different languages as we continue our individual spiritual journeys? Maybe something to talk about another day?

But for today, this all so hard to comprehend.  I should be so filled up with emotion about who and what You are but I’m not. As I write this, I wonder if I am simply in a peaceful state or if I am devoid of feelings. Sometimes it scares me to see how unfeeling I can be. I don’t want to be that way. I need divine intervention to change that, God. You are divine. You have the power. I want you to change me more and more into Your likeness. Now that I am beginning to grasp it, I think I am asking you to shape me into a being that is love itself. But, in some ways, that’s even more scary that the thought of having no feelings.

Heart Love… Incomprehensible Love

Yes, I’m starting to get it now, God.

Jesus, conceived in the womb of a woman, placed there by Your hand, lived in perfect communion with You. That communion translated to a living human-divine being walking on earth, living as total love, no selfish thoughts, no rude or cruel words, no hateful looks or painful touch. In spite of all the hurt, He walked confidently in a place of peace and love at all times. Yes, He spoke firmly to those who were the antithesis of love, like the Pharisees, those who instead of living in Your image, attempted to destroy that image of You in their attack on Jesus. But even then, Jesus loved. He never let go of that love.

In the final moments on the cross, He cried out with a heart broken and with love pouring out of that heart for those who rejected His love, “Father, forgive them for they know not what they do.” He wasn’t asking You to forgive them only because they physically tortured Him and emotionally abused Him and spiritually shut Him out. He was asking you to forgive them because they didn’t grasp the significance of turning away from a love that is incomprehensible.

They didn’t know what they were doing when they didn’t accept the greatest gift that could be offered, total acceptance, total forgiveness, total love so amazing that angels turned away in shame, shame that the Lover of all lovers was spurned by those to whom He gave that unconditional love, everything that He was and lived.

I was there. I was one of those who didn’t understand that love. I didn’t accept what He was offering to me. And that You, His Father, hidden in the blackness of the cloud, were One with Him in purpose. Incomprehensible, heart love! I still don’t understand it very well, but I am open to accept the love You want to give me as much as I am capable of receiving it. Someday I want others to say that, like You and Your Son, I too am love.

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15 Minutes with God: Is That Enough?

Posted on August 17, 2011 by Joy

In the morning, LORD, you hear my voice; in the morning I lay my requests before you and wait expectantly. (The Bible: Psalm 5: 2-2, NIV)

Life Blood

God, today I’m waiting for You. I don’t have any words of my own that I need to express. It’s Your turn to share Your heart if You want to.

My child, always My child. What I have to share with you is not always easy to tell you. You want answers to questions all the time, solutions to problems that you have. But that isn’t where I want to go in My relationship with you every day. Some days I just want to talk and to let you know that I am here. I long for you to connect deeply to My soul, to My heart, the heart of Your Father and King.

A good relationship doesn’t come from 15 minutes in the morning. It comes from keeping the connection open all the time, like keeping your arteries unclogged so the life-giving blood can flow freely carrying oxygen to all parts of your body.

Life blood

I am the blood and the oxygen. I carry life in the blood to feed every part of your body and mind. I can do that for you every day, but only if you allow the blood to get through. Don’t clog it up with garbage to block the free flow. The blood brings nutrients, the oxygen gives life, gives energy.

Jesus said, “I am the way, the truth and the life. No man comes to the Father but by Me.” So is the way the arteries – the channel, the conduit – which carry the blood? Is the truth the blood, the nutrients, travelling through the arteries? Is the life the oxygen carried by the blood?

God, I like the analogy. But what do I do with it? Would it be easy for people to understand? Or does it need a story to illustrate it? You always tell stories to illustrate Your points, God. What story do you have for me related to this?

My child, how do you expect Me to finish the story in a few minutes when you keep looking at the clock? Come back later or get up early tomorrow morning and spend more time with Me then. I can see you are rushed and aren’t ready to absorb it fully.

Now go and have a good day, My child. Imagine the blood coursing through your arteries, with nutrients feeding your body and soul, feeling alive because I am providing the oxygen so you can live life fully.

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